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About Me  jiaqian → fangirl. insane. beware. → am a little twisted, and a lot disturbing, but once you look past the insaneness, i'm quite interesting. → this is a mostly a place for me to wax horrible poetry and post cryptic rants that no one will understand but of late it has evolved into yet another angsty diary. but the last time i checked, that's what blogs are for. →also, lots of typos since i'm normally high (on life, not crack!), tipsy or depressed when i write my posts. seriously. → profanity galore. honest raw emotions. are you squirmy when it comes to emotions? → slightly unhinged. dancing on the edge yet in control. perfection is overrated. The likes ♥
kpop. k-indie. k-hiphop. uljjangs. k-models. the boy in header: model kang cheolwoong Links
my fic journalflavors Friends
Amanda/Pei Yun Chy Yun Debbie Euwing Gabby Jia Ying Jinzhi Muayyad Nadiah PhuiYee, Yeevon Samantha Seayunn Siauthung Yiwen YiLin Yishuen The others
Credits Layout design by Eefennie. edited by mua. | Saturday, June 16, 2012 seeing all the pictures of my friends cosplaying, i kinda want to do it too. no interest in the manga or anime but it seems interesting to able to pretend to be someone else for a while. you can wear a garter belt or show off your midriff or wear a scandalously short skirt, and everyone will just accept you and appreciate you. i like toying the idea of them toying with the edge of sexuality, turning sensuality into an art form. i kinda want to do that too, dress up to shock, turn into a sultry HBIC that makes jaws drop. any way i look at myself i still see a child. i want people's jaw to drop when they look at me, see me as a woman and not that cute little girl-next-door. which is why sometimes i play around like this. 
but it's still not sexy. that's try hard. it's somewhat frustrating to me that i still look like a high schooler. why is it that when most of my baby fat fell off, i looked younger and not more lady-like?
i wear heels and i strut around the place, but the people who hit on me are still way younger than me.
sometimes i just want to feel sexy. not with this face i can't u___u;; epik till the death of me; 3:23 PM Monday, June 04, 2012 SO! Yes. We won autograph passes, me and suimei, so we had 4. Just right for us!  After seeing the questions posed to Exo at their fanmeeting (black undies i see, Sehun?) I had the idea to do those post-it questions as well, but ugh post its are flimsy. So i took thick paper. But my words are fug, so eventually we got SM to rewrite em in her qt writing.  The beginning was ughhh. We reached pretty late, at about 1, and lounged around a bit, being obnoxious as usual. Man, the other fangirls must hate us. /really/. Some time later we realized that our passes entitled us to a special area and off we went. The first hour was stuffy as fuq and boring because there were lion dances and a long fashion show. Block B came out for a brief photo op.Then more performances, which at least I enjoyed a bit. Finally! They kicked off with U-Hoo-Hoo, my favourite song of theirs, in chairs. Then they did Wannabe, followed by Nanrina, and finished with Let's Get Retarded. I'm really disappointed that they sang the Retarded version instead of the Started version. Perfect english, yes, but ugh, it's insensitive. During Nanrina Ukwon did his flappy shirt thingy only in the second hook but when he did, hell did I scream. Then, autograph session! There was 100 of us. Yukwon was first and I told him to draw a heart, but he shook his head and drew a star. “Star,” he said, little troll. I whined, "Can't you draw a heart?" and he said okay. But then the manager pushed the poster to the next person, so he smiled apologetically at me, and high fived me. Then it was Jaehyo. Pretty flawless Jaehyo. I don't see how this boy can be real. He must be created with an extra bit of effort or something. Either by God or by a plastic surgeon. Jaehyo signed, and added a heart at my request. I asked him to write my name too, and he was about to, but the manager pushed the paper along, so he said sorry. It’s okay, bby ;A; High fived him, too. I looked over to P.O by then, but Jaehyo’s voice drew me back to him. “You have good skin.” … What? I thought he was talking to Amanda, but he was looking at me, smiling. It took me a few seconds to register that Jaehyo, PERFECT HUMAN DOLL was complimenting me. I wasn’t wearing makeup then, too. I never wear makeup. He grinned and added, “I’m jealous.” P.O was in a grumpy mood so he was barely smiling. I gave him the slip of paper which asked “Who’s cuter? IU or you?”. he ticked IU and I went, really? He scrunched his nose at me in response. It was the cutest thing ever omg. High five againnnn. I had a question for Taeil too. Your height? He looked at the paper, then squinted at lil old grinning me. He ticked that it’s a secret and shushed me. It was really very endearing. Taeil was very uncertain throughout. He drew a heart because again, I asked for it, and then a quick high five. Taeil is absolutely adorable. He reminded me of an elf, with his black framed glasses. Minhyuk signed pretty fast. He ignored my request of a heart and drew a star. Seeing that he wasn’t talking, I turned to Kyung. Since everyone was high fiving, I guess Minhyuk thought he had to do it too, but I was busy talking to Kyung, so he kinda reached out and awkwardly bumped my arm with a fist. It was so funny. He literally darted out, lightly punched my arm and drew back.That caught my attention and I turned to stare at him. He stared back. ... Then I held out my palm in front of me, stared pointedly at him, and he high fived it. Beside me, Kyung was all LOL. I told Kyung that my birthday was coming soon, and he told me congratulations. That threw me off a bit, because what? Happy birthday maybe, but congratulations? He was by far the friendliest. He shakes hands instead of high fives! He stuck his hand out first, in fact. I asked for hearts again, and he gladly agreed. He drew three little (ugly xD) hearts. 
The rest had questions too!
Amanda to Jaehyo:
Q: Korea’s sexy king is?
A: Me ✓/ Bbomb
when he read this, he got all excited and pointed to himself while saying, ME ME ME! we actually gave him the question twice. the first time with suimei, the manager stopped him from answering, so manda gave him it again (hence the different coloured paper ><) and this time he was all :DDDDD OBVS I’M HOTTER
Suimei to Kyung:
Q: The person with the larger eyes is?
A: Kyung ✓/ Jaehyo
When he received the question, Kyung was super happy and said, “Thank you!” He failed to realize that his answer is far from reality and the question isn’t a compliment lol. Suimei sideeyed the fuq out of him.
Deb to Ukwon:
Q: The animal that Yukwon looks like is?
A: Puppy ✓ / Cat
He barely had time to read the question, so I'm not sure if he answered correctly, because puppy, really?
Deb to P.O:
Q: Aegyo king is?
A: P.O ✓ / Yukwon
He was pretty pouty to all of us, but to this question he smiled at Deb.
Amanda to Ukwon: 
Q: I am most confident of my?
A: Sexiness ✓ / Cuteness
Block B is so niceeee. epik till the death of me; 1:23 AM |