|
About Me  jiaqian → fangirl. insane. beware. → am a little twisted, and a lot disturbing, but once you look past the insaneness, i'm quite interesting. → this is a mostly a place for me to wax horrible poetry and post cryptic rants that no one will understand but of late it has evolved into yet another angsty diary. but the last time i checked, that's what blogs are for. →also, lots of typos since i'm normally high (on life, not crack!), tipsy or depressed when i write my posts. seriously. → profanity galore. honest raw emotions. are you squirmy when it comes to emotions? → slightly unhinged. dancing on the edge yet in control. perfection is overrated. The likes ♥
kpop. k-indie. k-hiphop. uljjangs. k-models. the boy in header: model kang cheolwoong Links
my fic journalflavors Friends
Amanda/Pei Yun Chy Yun Debbie Euwing Gabby Jia Ying Jinzhi Muayyad Nadiah PhuiYee, Yeevon Samantha Seayunn Siauthung Yiwen YiLin Yishuen The others
Credits Layout design by Eefennie. edited by mua. | Sunday, June 27, 2010 sleepy. quick post. yesterday sucked but today was awesommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmme. we arrived in the morning and were ushered into line half an hour later. it was very organized, very orderly. then came the waiting part. but! halfway through, anthea came in with these tees and we put them on.  such attention grabbing garb. but that was the whole point, ne? we were getting pulled over by random people who wanted to take our photos. 8tv interviewed us. a guy from cube entertainment shot a vid of us. we walked onto stage and the first thing i told junhyung was that my birthday was coming soon. he smiled (idk, smirk? it seems like he never smiles) and told me happy birthday. then hyunseung did the same thing. i told them to look at our shirts and they did. repeated the birthday thing to doojoon and gikwang. doojoon was awesome, smiled and told me, "really? happy birthday!" gikwang just smiled tightly and went, "neh." then i told yoseob to look at our shirts and he went, in the cutest voice ever, "wah!" like a little boy. awesomeness ♥ there!  Labels: fan account epik till the death of me; 9:02 PM
► beast. i won rm8000 in the essay competition mentioned in the previous post! i got 2nd runner up. man, i knew i should've paid more attention. that was the good news. now for the bad news. let me start off with one of those words that describe everything and anything: the fuck. what a mess. i reached at 2 something pm. there was already maybe 200 people there. so we queued up. 5 minutes in, i noticed the huge flaw: there were no dividers or lines for us to queue up in. so we were basically one big mess. we waited. and waited... it was 7pm. it still didn't start. the fans started getting impatient and chanted for them to let us in. one girl wanted water, so one of the secustar guys took a fresh bottle, drank a sip out of it and threw it to the fan! needless to say, this fueled everyone's anger. and then girls started fainting here and there. i had to hoist 4 girls up the stairs. but wtf, why did i bother. those same girls later happily pranced onto stage to get their signatures while my album was EMPTY. after one and a half hours, we finally got in and got squeezed even more. i'm on the tall side and yet i had difficulty seeing things. there were signboards and cameras everywhere. not to mention the shrill screaming. dear god the screaming. my ears may never be the same again. they couldn't shut their yap when the boys were talking; wtf? how rude. and then the autograph session. i was on the side closer to the signing session and yet the people from the other side of the room got theirs while i didn't. they cut it off when there was just 20 people in front of me and maybe 30 behind. come on, 60 people takes less than 10 minutes, probably only around 5. but no, the host repeated "you can try again at the autograph session tomorrow at 5". i wanted to punch his teeth in. BUT! the boys were brilliant. the vocals were near perfect, the dancing (of course, since they've done this so many times) spot on. they were generous to the fans who got called on stage and the poor bbys were chipper despite missing the southkorea match. i'm not sure why i felt nothing though. it was like watching them on television. perhaps the bad experience before the showcase has dampened my spirits. i simply adore beast. i just find the fact that i was basically numb weird. Labels: fan account epik till the death of me; 1:00 AM Saturday, June 26, 2010 just came back from an essay writing competition. well actually, i should be there. but knowing me, the queen of flakiness, i bailed as soon as i can. imagine, if i actually won (fat chance!) it'll be ~awkward~. everyone looked like they had a stick up their ass, in their coats and ties. i was in... haha, my school's tracksuit. yay! \^^/ the white guy was like, "this is a prestigious event... you should be honoured to be chosen... the papers will be double marked for two master holders of oxford university..." so in short, we are ~the chosen ones~ all hail us! i wrote about how the internet encroaches our privacy. hello irony! this from the girl who's an avid blogger and twitter. hi, here's the past 5 years of my life, laid out bare for all to see. the hypoocrisy of it all. *faints* i just rushed through the entire thing because I'M GOING TO BEAST'S SHOWCASE TODAY! YAY! we're only going 5 hours in advance, that's all... (excuse my general failiness in this post. severe lack of sleep does that to you) epik till the death of me; 12:00 PM Thursday, June 24, 2010 if you know me, you probably know that "innocent" is not exactly the right word to describe me. for some reason, a lot of people are still surprised when they find out i'm not the straightlaced ice princess they thought i was. they look at the way my hair is always pulled up into a hassle free ponytail, the way i'm aloof to them and barely respond, the fact that i'm in the "good" class and assume i am quiet and a goody two shoes. lawl you've obviously never seen me fangirling, or chugging down my sixth glass of champagne. so to amuse myself, i keep up the good girl image as much as i can, just for kicks. but sometimes i forget. i'll see something like this: 
and i'll go, without even thinking, hell yeah, i'll tap that, complete with smirk (leer?)
... at which point i remember my company and then turn over to see the D:! look on their face. it's fun, really.
people write me smut fics every year for my birthday and i go "hello underage *flails around*" and then proceed to drool over the descriptions.haha this is the latest response i got to my "DON'T CORRUPT ME VIRGIN EYESSSS". Pfffft, yeahh, like I could ever corrupt someone who's been corrupted since...birth?? XD Don't deny it, bb~ even someone from the other side of the world knows *sobs* like i always say, i want to coax my innocence into coming back but i'm not sure we were ever properly introduced in the first place. epik till the death of me; 11:40 PM Saturday, June 19, 2010 i'm baaaaaack. our timing sucked. it happened to be the dragon boat festival (HOW COULD WE HAVE FORGETTEN ;A;) and it's one of those rare three day holidays so everyone gets out. the number of people at the expo in one day? 550,000. what does that translate to? major lines.  up to 6 hours for the bigger pavillions (germany, japan, spain). it is virtually impossible to get into these pavillions in under 3 hours. so yeah, we gave those three a skip. we spent an average of 13 hours a day walking and standing. that's more than 2 days of sleep combined T^T we managed to go to 45 pavillions. could've been more but we went back in the afternoon on the 3rd day. 18 pavillions on the first day itself, amazing feat, if you ask me. the sky was cloudy and kinda dark the whole time, which made for awful photographs. 
it's way better at night. the weather is cooler and the crowds thinned down.the buildings are all so beautiful lit up. look at mexico's for example. 
the first night, i had a sex on the beach (that's a cocktail btw) at the lithuana
pavillion and was feeling a lot better. the bartender was taken back when he
realised how underage i was. haha
then there was the thing with the colombian guy (that wink and smile
combo? deadly. *fans self*) and i was as happy as pie.
the second night we lay down at the grassy plain outside the UK pavillion and
watched the night sky. the seeds stored in the UK pavillion :D this is the estonia pavillion.  it's filled with piggy banks where you vote for ideas. an idea bank. then we took a ferry trip across the river and looked at the night view. 
my top 3 pavillions
1. state gridthis looks unassuming from the outside but there's a thing called the magic box. it's apparently the first in the world, with LED screens covering all six walls. it has the most amazing effects i've seen. 2. USA it takes about 20-30 minutes to tour this one, arguably the longest. there's THREE short videos. the first shows foreigners trying out chinese, which is always amusing. the second one has various important people and cute kids talking about the future and the environment. the third is a cute short film about a girl wanting to create a garden in a deserted lot. you'll need both english and chinese skills to fully appreciate this pavillion though. 3. South Korea haha so i'm amazingly biased. surprise surprise. waited the longest for this. THREE FULL HOURS. but heeeey, it was all kinda worth it because there was a 15 minute clip featuring yunho as the lead, suju m and f(x).  first i must say, yunho can't act. it works for fangirls but 98% of the audience don't even know kpop. they're supposed to be "green superheroes" that uh, green-ify the city and make people smile but yunho = a cute bundle of fail. he manages to piss shiwon, the leader, off and break a girl's doll. (of course shiwon is the leader. he has that rich, superior face) sulli had the second most screen time. the rest appeared in split second flashes. when donghae peered straight into the screen, a girl a few rows away sighed loudly and went "how handsome~". universal fact, bby. there were also some sm clips in the hallway. haha shiwon. see what i mean by superior face? 
so if you're planning to go to the expo, here's a tip that make it so much
better.LEARN CHINESE. most pavillions focused on chinese visitors while only a handful focused on english visitors. sometimes there aren't subs for the videos, in english or chinese. by knowing both languages, you can pretty much navigate with ease. i helped out many foreigners when they looked quite lost xD the local chinese seemed to have a fascination with fellow chinese who can speak english. when i was talking to a swedish airstewardess on the subways, everyone just kinda of... stared at us. and if your skin is a different colour from the chinese, you're automatically An Attraction. they take pictures of the poor unsuspecting foreign tourists as well as of all the dark or white skinned employees in the pavillion. so! that's the end of my MESSY post. i will collapse and sleep now. epik till the death of me; 12:17 AM Saturday, June 12, 2010 i'm going to shanghai tonight :D won't be online for a week. if there's anything, please tag me in facebook! xD THAT i can do. meteor shower makes me feel good because haha the two leads have never dated in the beginning of the drama. you know... until they get with each other. it's so much better than the other versions. \^^/ edit_ it's my brother's birthday today and my dad gave him an one litre bottle of vodka cognac. i'm not sure who's happier, me or my brother xD he's a hard liquor kind of guy, so i think it might as well be my gift haha. epik till the death of me; 1:51 PM Thursday, June 10, 2010 the thing above is a short video btw. i'm not good at this girly stuff. i almost fell asleep while she was prodding at my nails and i chipped it almost immediately. epik till the death of me; 9:05 PM Tuesday, June 08, 2010 so brian joo is coming to malaysia. yesterday i was so happy i just about peed my pants. i was way happier than the prospect of meeting beast because well, i knew beast would be coming sooner or later but brian... never in a million years would i have dreamed that mr. sexay (hahahaha) himself would set foot in this country. the difference between normal tickets and vip tickets are RM120 and a handshake. if i get the vip tickets, i could totally besides, nothing can beat my handshake from donghae. *gloatsgloatsgloats* btw, I PREORDERED MY BEAST ALBUM/TSHIRT/TICKET TODAY! and and! i was blog surfing and i found a sentence from my latest fanfic. then i realised she's one of the form 4 prs. that's freaky. my junior read my fic. SOMEONE I KINDA KNOW READ MY FIC. epik till the death of me; 11:18 PM Monday, June 07, 2010 i'm so smitten with 朱梓骁 that i'm watching the chinese mainland version of hana yori dango/meteor garden/boys over flowers. but really, i don't need to watch the same plot four times, albeit set in four different countries. hell, 一起去看流星 has 36 episodes. but he is so cuuuute how can i resist. and funny too! besides he was wearing this flamboyantly pink outfit in his first scene and a man gotta have guts to pull something like that off. i adore their accents sfm. haha it's funnier than the korean version that's for sure. and it's set in college, which is way more realistic than the korean version. it has better acting than the taiwanese version and less cheesy scenes haha. the thing that sets this apart from all the rest is that their junpyo (for convinience's sake i use the korean names) isn't originally part of F4, but a newcomer. they aren't even friends in the first place. the best part is, my cutie, the one who plays the role of yijung is the pack leader. kjaslkjdla this change in plot is making me very very happy. i haven't watched anything IN MY OWN LANGUAGE for months. so its refreshing. there's something about their clipped, perfect accents that appeals to me a little more. oh maaaan i can't stop watching now. and and! i ♥ the chunface's drama, kimi ga ireba. IT IS IN KOREAN/JAPANESE YO. i hate the girl, but ooooh bad!chun is hot. and the effortless switches between japanese and korean dialogue is amazing. i bet it'll be 10000000000000000000x better than jae's twitter drama. no seriously, wtf? epik till the death of me; 3:30 PM Sunday, June 06, 2010 and this is where i turn into the average female teenage blogger and litter my blog post with selfcams and 크크크 s. because it's been a while since i acted like one xD i painted my nails black again, as per my holiday custom. gave my dad a bit of a shock haha. 
i went for drivers ed class yesterday, although admitedly a bit unwilling.i was so glad to know that i could actually sit for the class and take the exam in english. hella glad, because when i flipped the malay handbook open, my mind just shut down on itself. when i reached there, only two seats were left- one beside this cute boy listening to his ipod and another beside a bespectacled boy reading a book. no point guessing where i headed to, but someone sat beside cutie before i did so i sat beside the reader. but it was alright, since he seemed to be a pretty nice guy, laughing at all the right points during the class and reading a seemingly interesting book. (i'm a softie for books :D). we didn't speak for the full 7 hours that we sat next to each other but somehow i found out his name and school, among some other information. ... my stalkerish characteristics come out again. anyway, every time i turned around, i accidentally caught ipod boy's gaze and then at lunch i realized he was following me. he said hi to me and before we could start talking, i was pulled away by another girl who wanted to show me something. i didn't get a chance to speak to him after. such a shame too, because he's adorable and hey, he's a creeper, i'm a creeper, we can creep together :D epik till the death of me; 10:15 PM Wednesday, June 02, 2010 i have to say, i'm probably more accessible than most of my peers. i'm on every other social networking site (whether i frequently use it is another matter), every blog host and most of the new internet fads that have popped up here and there. due to my love of the gab, just reading through these profiles and posts would build a pretty complete picture from my life and my personality. so my life is an open book. (or an open webpage, if you want to get all technical about it. but i digress) i'm cool with that. i just wish that i could be a good book. what do i mean? you know how some books stay with you forever? it could be years on and you're trying desperately to remember what you had for lunch or when your wedding anniversary is, but you can still vividly remember that particular scene in that particular book? i want to impact someone in some way. i feel like i'm blue tack. i just peel off surfaces, without leaving much of a mark. would your life be any different without me? probably not. i'm interchangable. after all, what you need is a friend who listens, not a friend who could win against a debater. it worries me slightly, how little impact i make ten years later, when you're at some class reunion and someone mentions my name, would you still be able to picture my face or remember my personality? or would you completely forget my existance? i feel myself slipping away already. i feel like i don't really belong, like everyone doesn't really mind whether i'm there or not. and that's a feeling i've been getting since i can remember. maybe it's because i've never had a "soulmate". i haven't found someone i can give my all to and vice versa. and maybe i never will. to find a second me... maybe i'll have to search the world over. try to remember me, aight? i'll call you up one day in 20 years and if you don't remember me, don't be surprised to find your car window broken the next day :D epik till the death of me; 11:48 PM |